Celebrity Gossip or News?

On my comcast homepage as I write, these are the top"news" stories: 1)Stressed out Witherspoon quits job." 2) Van Halen: I'm going to rehab for fans. 3) Selma Hayak engaged and expecting. 4) NHL Player suspended for stick to face. 5) Winslet denies diet doctor claims, wins.

Hey, "News" editors, I have NEWS for you. This is not NEWS! This is celebrity gossip. News would be information about the war, the economy, government policy, and other events that have more significance that the posterior portions of a rat's anatomy!