A Note to Our "Gimme" Society

.... the three things we crave most in life -- happiness, freedom, and peace of mind -- are always attained by giving them to someone else.

-General Peyton C. March (1864-1955)

Forum on manhood misses the mark

Columnist Jim Wooten recently wrote a commentary about a March conference held at Macon State College. The conference was ostensibly "a conversation about manhood" and was led by a group of black professionals such as doctors, teachers, lawyers, clergypersons, and politicians. Mr. Wooten's comments were based on a report in The Macon Telegraph written by reporter, Ashley Tusan Joyner, in which she details some of the topics discussed in the conference. Go to the link above for Mr. Wooten's full article; I found the comments below especially interesting.

But it is shocking to read that given the opportunity to have a conversation about manhood with young males, role models who are successful and accomplished in life chose to talk to them as potential criminals and as victims....

Not addressed, apparently, was manhood, as in fatherhood. Or manhood, as in taking responsibility... The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported in early March that at least one in four teenage girls nationally has a sexually transmitted disease. Among black teens ages 14-19, it’s nearly half.

Another study released last week offers findings that are...further evidence of the need to reorient the conversation. ... 25 percent of white children, 46 percent of Hispanics and 69 percent of blacks are born to unmarried women....When combined with divorce... almost a third of children live in single-parent homes...

Any number of studies have documented the harm to children and the social costs in higher rates of crime, drug abuse, poverty, mental and physical illnesses, educational failures, and other damaging consequences to children deprived of the life-guiding influence of both parents.

Now Benjamin Scafidi, an economist in the J. Whitney Bunting School of Business at Georgia College & State University in Milledgeville, presents valuable new research on the economic costs. “We estimate that family fragmentation costs U.S. taxpayers at least $112 billion each and every year, or more than $1 trillion each decade,”..... If public policies encouraging marriage reduced family fragmentation by just 1 percent, the savings to taxpayers would amount to $1.1 billion yearly, the study finds.

It seems clear that the conversation about what constitutes “manhood” needs to change, especially when the government, the media, opinion leaders and community role models gather young men to help them define it. Manliness is not creating and abandoning babies and the women who bear them.

Leah Ward Sears, chief justice of the Georgia Supreme Court, is one of the voices stepping up...

“Healthy marriage is not only the best place to raise children, it is the indispensable institution without which all other social reform efforts will fail,” she said. “Healthy and intact families are the cradle of thriving societies.” Preach that. Teach that. Counsel that.

The Job of Cooking #9 - Quick and Easy Meals

Tips for when you just need to get a meal on the table...

(Click on the logo above for an explanation of this feature of Daddy's Roses.)

Remember that a nutritious meal need only have a small amount of protein along with some fruits and/or veggies. The protein can be a small amount of meat, or it can be a combination of dairy and grain such as a cheese sandwich, or it can be dried beans. A starch such as bread, potatoes, or rice can add filler if your family needs (or wants ) a heavier meal.

One quick and easy one-dish meal would be to add any leftover meat to bagged salad. If you don't have any left-over meat from the day before, open a can of chicken breast or tuna.

A grilled cheese sandwich served with tomato soup makes a complete meal.

A peanut butter sandwich with apple slices (or fresh grapes or celery sticks) on the side makes a complete meal.

A scrambled-egg sandwich served with fruit would be a quick choice.

Another quick and easy one-dish complete meal: Cut up a couple of chicken breasts (half-thawed meat is easiest to slice), cook the bite-size pieces in a skillet with a little olive oil and add whatever fresh or frozen veggies you have on hand, season as desired, and stir-fry until done. You could serve this "as is" or with rice or some other starchy vegetable.

Thursday Thirteen - My Edition 62 - Secrets to Long Life

Thursday Thirteen

I know that the theme of Thursday Thirteen this week is supposed to be vacation places, but I have written several times about vacation spots, so I am reporting instead on an article I read recently about life habits of centenarians.

The May/June issue of The AARP magazine had a special report on four Blue Zones around the world where many people live to be over 100 years of age. The author of the article coined the term "Blue Zone" in an earlier article he wrote for National Geographic in 2005, "The Secrets of Long Life." The Nicoya Peninsula of Costa Rica is one newly-researched zone. Here are 13 of the secrets of long life that Dan Buettner discovered in talking to the centenarians who live there.

1. Have a strong sense of purpose.

2. Drink hard water.

3. Keep a focus on family.

4. Eat a light dinner.

5. Maintain social networks.

6. Keep hard at work.

7. Get some sensible sun.

8. Embrace a common history.

In addition to this list of eight life-habits that the author specifically culled from his interviews and listed, I found evidence for several others that seem just as important.

9. Reach out to others. The author interviewed a lady named Panchita; in that interview he mentions that she has a habit of reaching out and touching the arm of the person to whom she is talking. This literal "reaching out" is just an outward sign of the inner tendency to "reach out" emotionally to connect with others.

10. Don't harbor worries and grudges. Panchita tells several stories that illustrate this life habit. She tells of her son's murder but finishes the tale with, "God does everything for a reason. I am a blessed woman today." When she finishes retelling the story of chasing away and beating a peeping tom when she was bathing in the river at age 70, she says, "I did a bad thing, ...but still God blesses me."

11. Eat natural and non-processed foods. Panchita's family grows most of their own foods, and her idea of a treat is a banana. Sugar and salt were hard to come by and seldom used.

12. Socialize and network intergenerationally. Each old person's story mentioned children who regularly visited with the centenarians; each mentioned younger adults who either helped or depended to some degree upon the older adult. The centenarian both contributed to and received contributions from persons of other generations.

13. Take care of your appearance. Panchita greeted the visitors wearing a festive dress, long colorful earrings, and had her hair pulled back and held with a rhinestone-studded comb. Her nails were neatly trimmed and she wore a silver band on her ring finger.

A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood - Whitetail Deer

I just went for a morning walk around our neighborhood. By the time I had a light jacket (for the morning chill), a bottle of water (I'm never without one), my reading glasses (ya never know when you might need to actually SEE something closeup), my sunglasses, my cellphone (don't leave home without it!), my ipod (listening to a novel keeps me walking), and some tissues, I decided against also hanging the camera around my neck. Mistake!

As I walked my two mile track winding around nearby short lightly-traveled streets, I found myself in a stand-off with a group of 5 deer. They obviously wanted to go where I had just been. They stood back and warily watched me approach. I veered from my planned route at the intersection in order to give them a wide berth and not further concern them. As soon as I turned in the opposite direction, I could almost hear their sigh of relief and their leader turned and signaled them that it was now safe to continue on their way. They had bravely stood their ground and let me approach to within about 50 feet apparently aware that I could make a turn in the opposite direction when I got to the street. They ran behind a house and peered around the corner at me to be sure I was continuing to put distance between them and me. What an opportunity for a picture I missed.

Simpsonwood - A Retreat Center

We just got home yesterday from a Sunday School Class retreat at Simpsonwood. This is a beautiful retreat facility located on the banks of the Chattahoochee River just North of the perimeter road (I-285) of Atlanta. The land was donated to the North Georgia Conference of the United Methodist Church back in the 6o's. There was stipulation that the land not be sold but used as a retreat center. Many church members of the day objected to accepting the gift (which had already been refused by the Presbyterian Church I understand), but it was eventually accepted. For a number of years the land was mostly unused, but gradually the building began. First a church -- later an administration building with large kitchen and dining rooms, meeting rooms, a large lobby, and a beautiful rocking chair back porch. The grounds now house the administrative offices of the conference (the Bishop's office among others), 5 lodging facilities, numerous walking trails and other recreational features such as swimming pool, soccer field, tennis courts, etc.

The Fellowship class of our church asked my DH to be the spiritual leader of the retreat. We had a group of 36 attend and had a wonderful time. We had 3 "sessions" and a worship service, but the remainder of the time was ours to spend enjoying the beautiful surrounding and spending time with our Christian friends. Here is a pic or the atrium where we had our sessions, at the bottom of the page is the chapel where our worship service was held. We went for a nice long wooded walk along the river Sunday afternoon. The weather was perfect. The wildlife was enjoying the habitat as well - we saw 3 deer and numerous squirrels. The entire weekend provided a refreshing and renewing experience.

BTW, the retreat center accepts church groups from all denominations, family reunions, and other groups. One can also check in as in any motel or hotel and spend a night or two, with or without meals included. A homeschool organization was setting up to use one of the convention buildings for CRCT testing as we left Monday morning.

Sunday Seven 49th Edition

I have seen several YouTube videos (and one from another source) this week that I found either entertaining, amazing, amusing, or simply interesting. I will try to link them here.

1. The Devil's Swimming Pool - atop Victoria Falls. Can you imagine jumping into this pool as the water all around you plunges over the falls into the gorge below?!

2. My brother's squirrel dance - The fun never stops with Terrell! Scroll to the bottom under the still pics.

3. Explanation of the procedure of late-term abortion. A representative from a group called Priests for Life demonstrates the procedure. I don't know how to classify this one - maybe you'd rather not see it.

4. Grammar Rock - I have always enjoyed the Schoolhouse Rock series.

5. Sand Art - Shalom!

6. Then there's always Barbeque Art! Whatever! To each his own, I guess.

7. And for finishers -- here's another amusing squirrel video.

I hope my links work - I have to learn how to imbed a video so one can just click on the screen.

Happy Weekend, Friends!

Thursday Thirteen - My Edition 61 - Unfinished Posts

Thirteen Blogposts I have Started but Never Finished

I have sometimes described myself as a "compulsive finisher." That is an apt description most of the time - I find it difficult to leave a job half-done. I believe that this is a common attribute of perfectionists - we put off starting a job because we don't want to start what we won't have time or energy to complete. This morning I set out to finish up a couple of blog posts and rediscovered several embryonic pieces that I had forgotten about. Here are 13 of them:

1. Back in June of 2006 I started a post I titled "Teenagers: Work or School?" I never finished this one because I see both sides of that issue and never could draw satisfactory conclusions.

2. In January 2007, collected several interesting jokes, quotes, etc. about the use of prepositions and intended to incorporate them into a humorous post.

3. In March of 2007 I set out to write about the merits of poetry and some tips for writing it.

4. April last year was a big year for false starts in my writing. I drafted a post purportedly to teach the 8 parts of speech and their usage.

5. Also in April 2007 I wanted to pontificate on the background of the word "vocation" and what it means.

6. I had a flash of insight and inspiration on how a wide base of general knowlege is essential to reading success.

7-9. My brain flashes in April 2007 continued with just-begun posts on: How Doctors Think, Use of Time, and Setting Goals.

10. In May I intended to write a Mother's Day post, but you know what they say about good intentions...

11. In July I wanted to write a post about Bread. I gathered information about the etymology of the word, both in English and in Spanish as well as the Biblical analogy of Jesus as the Bread of Life.

12-13. Before our cruise in November, I prepared an individual post about each port of call on the cruise. I pasted in back-ground information on each port city and planned to add in personal information from our experience there. Oops! Never got around to finishing those 8 or 10 posts!